|This might come as a surprise but it takes me weeks to write these emails.
When I sit down to write them immediately the little girl in me thinks, how dare you? What makes you think that anyone cares where we have been or where we are going? The abandoned little girl inside if me reminds me that we are not enough. Remember she says, that our mom left us cause we were not enough? That no matter what we do, write or where we travel to or have been, no one will love us and they will leave us anyway. But, ain’t I a healer? you ask.
Yes, Yes I am “thetravelinghealer or #thepeopleshealer and even healers, especially healers and first responders, and everyone on the front lines of social justice, of people work need healing from their own incomplete past. As I reflect on the current political times and its continuous impact on my community, my own family and the earth, I too have lost something these past couple of years. I have lost hope and gained anxiety. I have lost faith and gained numbness and I have lost power and gained fear in a way I never thought. There is no way that one cannot be faced with their own past right now. A historical past being rewritten and an intergenerational past being awoken in all of us. I have spoken to so many comrades who have shared feelings of powerlessness, questioning their roles, their positions, and their ability to make a change. Many questioning our own existence. Faced with our deepest fear, in deep reflection, there is no way that some of us have not pulled out all our survival skills to survive these times. And for me not being enough is my strongest survival mechanism. It keeps me safe at home and not out in front, succeeding. It makes me small, not taking too much space or making too much noise. For all intent and purpose not being enough keeps me oppressed and well, being a good slave.
So, when my little girl reminds me how we have survived all these years, of course at first, I believe her and then I remember. I look back at who I was and I also remember that I am not her anymore. That all my healing has transformed me. I remind her I am, we are unstoppable, unshakeable, unapologetic, and unrecognizable. She needs to trust me I tell her. Its Fall and we are the divine source. We are our own mother and this season we are Enough.
Are you Enough?
This question is my gift to us all this Fall season. Being Enough in a world that says we are negotiable, we are dispensable and we are not enough to belong here. Being enough has to be our weapon our medicine this Fall, our strongest survival tool and self-care practice. But first let’s think about what do we need to restore, repair, heal and cultivate in our lives, to show up as enough?
Ask yourself: What myths have been told to you about you that does not belong to you? What would be possible in your life if being Enough is what led your life this season?
Miracles happen when I believe I am Enough. I walk straighter, I look people in the eyes, I hang with friends, I am a better lover, partner, wife, mother, and daughter. And most of all I am a more powerful, magical social justice activist, organizer, and healer. When I am enough, I pack fear in my bag make it my ally and travel anyway and most importantly I get BOLD enough to write you these emails.In all my voices, (my little girl and my adult self), Our gift for us this Fall season is the declaration of being enough! May we be free from the suffering of a past we had no control over. May we be free from believing that we are not enough and that we don’t belong and be free of the suffering it causes to our minds, body, and spirit when we internalize it. May we be open to all the possibilities that being enough opens up for us. May you know there is more to you than what people say or this world has you believe. I pray that this fall we see the option of another world and that we empty our minds of all limiting beliefs that keep us stagnant. And I pray that this moment, this life, this year, these days and hours leading up to the possibility of another world you stand in nothing but your most powerful legendary self.
In BOLD Love,
P.S. No one should be alone right now. Please, reply to this message and let me know what being enough means to you and what challenges do you face when you don’t feel like you are enough?
WHAT BEING ENOUGH LOOKS LIKE For Me THIS FALL? COME OUT AND Travel with me…